.

Yes, rico is to blame! He's the reason why my blog hasn't been updated.
Ehhh, I'm not going into details. So anyways, HAPPY LATE THANKSGIVING!!!
My TG was pretty cool despite the fact that I had to work....but it was
fun none the less. (Sidenote: I haven't checked my myspace in a few
days....and smh@ the bullshit. I'm convinced people are fucking
retarded) anywho, I got some stories to tell and some shit to
address....ill blog it up later tho.....
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

*sigh*

Dont cha just wish you had love like this? This video made me cry......*love sigh* and the fact that im crazy emotional today is wack!

So before I came to work, I started cleaning up and stuff...... ya
know.... my usual....and I thought to myself hmmmm, I should get a
little snack before I go to work. Soooooo, I open my fridge and all I
saw was 1 beer! Check the pic.

I don't know whats more fucked up; the fact that I only have a beer in
my fridge, the fact that I failed to remember that I didn't have shit in
my fridge to begin with, or the fact that I have beer ALL THE TIME.

Ehhh this is my life lol

Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

I think were on 5, right? Well anywho....my love life is at a stand
still. By choice of course-- that offer I talked about in the last entry
is still on the table...but I don't know, I just don't think I'm ready?
Speaking of offers I reunited with a guy from my past and we have been
talking a lot lately...and he tells me a lot how much he likes me....
and I like him too...but it kind of feels like he is a rebound guy from
john.

Oh! Did I mention that johnnnnnnnn has completed his quest for love
mission? Yeah, apparently he's dating some chick *rolls eyes* whatever.
John and I made up...he said sorry...I said sorry and in the midst of
that we kind of in some weird uncanny way said our goodbyes to each
other. We literally went from talking everyday to not talking at all and
when I did try talking to him it wasn't the same chemisty AT
ALL...hmph... its a shame but inevitable none the less.

There goes that logic again.....

Well I don't know how long it will be before I update 'celibacy and the
city'. Things seem to be going slow and oddly enough... I'm okay with
it. I guess I've morfed into one of those 'I'm focused on my
career/school/future' chicks rather than the 'I'm looking for love' dumb
asses. Ehhh?

Updates on the others....
Steve: we talk here and there but no updates at all...I love him he
loves me we are never going to move past that because of my location.
Yada yada yada....

Mr Suave: we haven't been talking much due to conflicting schedules. I
miss him like CRAZY! Hopefully changes will be made that will allow us
to talk way more than we do now.

Pablo: is still a cute stupid asshole. Lol that I can't get rid of
because he's just so hot. Lol

And another thing....I want to know whyyyy do ex-boyfriends think they
have some sort of head start on the new guys? ALL of my ex's think this
way and I just don't get it....I'm still friends with all of them except
for 1...and they all have the same mindset that if they decide they want
to get back together ill be all for it. To be honest, I wouldn't get
back with any of them...and that's just being real.

Ehhhh....whatever.
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Look at my baby all covered in snow :( the guy at firestone told me to
get new front tires before the snow falls.....and I didn't! :( who knew
it would snow so freaking soon!? Did I mention I HATE cleveland
weather?
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

So tomorrow I'm going to hit the job trail, I need a second job to
support my supra/clothing/random gadgets fetish....and not to mention
christmas is approching FAST! And I really want to buy my mom a snow
blower (she wants one bad)-- those shits run for at least $300. I'm
broke....so a second job is defffffff what I need. Oh! And I really
should start buying more crap for my apartment. Oh, and billions needs a
bed....I can go on and on about how much stuff I need to buy-- soooo ima
shut up.

Guess what I did....I was late paying my rent. NOT because I didn't have
the money and NOT because I didn't get the money order.....

but I did forget to drop that shit in the mailbox :-/

Ehhh, forgetful appleb.

Weird shit...so I was checking my tmail and I got 2 emails from this
wack ass guy that I use to date asking me to vote for his kid in some
pampers picture contest. Now, it wouldn't be so bad/weird/random if we
didn't end our friendship on such bad terms. I just don't understand the
male brain. I can go into detail on this situation... buttttt he doesn't
deserve that much blog space.

Okay, dinner is ready! See u fools later.
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

So, this sunday is a rather lame sunday. This sunday isn't that much
different than past sundays...I don't know what it is, I guess I'm EMO
today?

Ehhhh.....anywho, friday I got my yearly progress report at work and I
must say IT WAS TOTAL BULLSHIT. So for those of you who don't know, I
work in a group home for mentally disabled men (3rd shift) and I've been
working there for the past 3 years. So within the last year we've had
over 4 managers....so the last one we had ended up doing my YEARLY
report. So the first question ask the manager to summerize the
employee-- she writes

" its really hard to summerize andreia because she's so quiet, but quiet
is a GREAT thing :-)"

Okay, so...the next question asks did this employee meet this years
expectations? She answers with

"No, andreia doesn't communicate with managers enough and she needs to
make it to more meetings"

Lol...hold on there's more.

So the next question asks the manager to list a few good things about
the employee. She writes

"Andreia never calls off of work, she's enjoys her job, she is always on
time, and she works great with the guys and her fellow employees"

Now, I think its more than obvious to see the bullshit all over this
report, but lets point them out anyway.

A.) She's been working at out house for about 3months. HOW THE FUCK CAN
SHE MAKE A YEARLY REPORT AND SHE HASN'T BEEN WORKING FOR THE COMPANY FOR
A FUCKING YEAR? AND BEING THAT I WORK 3RD SHIFT I'VE SEEN HER AND GOOD
UMMMMM 3 TIMES.

B.) I'm quiet but that's a good thing...then she goes on to say I don't
communicate enough with her? OKAY, I'VE BEEN WORKING THERE FOR 3 1/2
YEARS...MY QUESTIONS ARE LIMITED BECAUSE I KNOW WHAT THE FUCK I'M DOING
AND IF I RUN INTO A ROAD BLOCK ILL ASK AN EMPLOYEE TO POINT ME IN THE
RIGHT DIRECTION. OTHER THAN ME ASKING THE MANAGMENT QUESTIONS ABOUT MY
JOB WHAT THE FUCK DO WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT? I DON'T CARE HOW YOU'RE
WEEKEND WAS, I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR NEW CAR, I DON'T CAR ABOUT THE MAN
THAT YOU'RE DATING. THIS IS WORK, LETS KEEP IT THAT WAY.

C.) She ends the report by saying; "I'm never late, I enjoy what I do, I
never call off, and I work well with the guys and my fellow
co-workers" ISN'T THAT ALL THAT FUCKING MATTERS?! WTF AM I IN THE
FUCKING TWILIGHT ZONE?!

*sigh* lol

The only thing that I do agree with is the fact that I don't go to those
stupid ass meetings where they talk about the same dumb bullshit...over
and over. Ehhh, sue me!

So, I'm thinking when school starts I'm giving my 2weeks notice.
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

My sidekick has been acting really gay lately...I've been writing mad
blogs, sending them in, and to my surprise they haven't been posting.
Pfft! Also, more bad news MY P.C IS BROKEN ONCE AGAIN. I'm seriously
thinking about becoming a MAC....smh

READ! READ! READ!<br>Okay now for the "out there" shit.....I finally started reading 'The
power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle. Nigga, this
book....is.....fucking.....nuts! And I mean that in a good way.

Read this: (its from the book)
The book is in Q&A format....

Question:
Aren't the past and future just as real, sometimes even more real,
than the present? After all, the past determines who we are, as well as
how we perceive and behave in the present. And out future goals
determine which actions we take in the present.

Answer:
You haven't yet grasped the essence of what I am saying because you
are trying to understand it mentally. The mind cannot understand this.
Only YOU can. Please just listen.

Have you ever experienced, done, thought, or felt anything outside the
Now? Do you think you ever will? Is it possible for anything to happen
or BE outside the Now? The answer is obvious, is it not?

Nothing ever happened in the past; it happened in the Now.

Nothing will ever happen in the future; it will happen in the Now.

What you thing of as the past is a memory trace, stored in the mind, of
a former Now. When you remember the past you reactivare a memory trace
-- and you do so now. The future is an imagined Now, a projection of the
mind. When the future comes, it comes as the now. Past and future
obviously have no reality of their own. Just as the moon has no light of
its own, but can only reflect the light of the sun, so are past and
future only pale reflections of the light, power, and reality of the
eternal present. Their reality is "borrowed" from the Now.

The essence of what I am saying here cannot bw understood by the mind.
The moment you grasp it, there is a shift in consciousness from mind to
being, from time to presence. Suddenly, everything feels alive, radiates
energy, emmanates being.

[ The Power Of Now -- by Eckhart Tolle]

I'm saying tho?....lol I can't say much after that.
I'm only on page 83...ill definatly be blogging about this more when I'm
done reading it.
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Lately I havent been into t.v much. I'm not one of those "ohhh I'm to
good for t.v I'd rather hike a trail in my local park" you know, those
losers. I don't know what my deal is. I'm guessing its the lack of good
programing that keeps me away....ehh? BUT there are a few shows that I
literally plan my day around lol.....

-The Hills
-Law And Order
-Late Night W/ Conan O'brein
-The Rachael Zoe Project
-The Steve Wilkos Show
-Celebrity Rehab

Other than these few programs...I really don't fuck with the T.V. ,
shun!

The point of this blog? None of the programs I listed are on...so I'm
bored out of my miz-nd.

Oh! I've been playing video games lately too....I think I'm filling a
void of some sort. -_-

Whatever.

Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

*sigh* arent they beautiful????

Photos by: me!

"Love is not love / Which alters when it alteration finds, / Or bends
with the remover to remove: / O, no! It is an ever-fixed mark, / That
looks on tempests and is never shaken."

(I'm fucked.)
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

He's my ex *dramatic music plays* yea son..my EX. (We will call him
David) Okay so we didn't have a bad break up...well we did but we got
over it and stayed friends, so we've been talking on and off since my
bday which was sept 5th. So in the midst of rekindling the old flame,
david tells me how he's always been in love with me and he wants to be
with me...and heres the doooosey he is willing to relocate to be with me
and make things work. (You already know he's a NY guy) Okay so if I get
with david it wouldn't be settling because I've always liked this guy
for many reasons.

Now for the drama--- the other night when I was talking to him...he kept
asking to be with me but I couldn't give him an answer because I wasn't
sure if I was ready to be on lock!...its been 8 wonderful/wack
months...I'm kind of on a roll and getting use to being single. Am I
willing to let all of that go for a commited relationship?? And as I was
asking myself that---john came to mind! I've been talking to john more
than ANYBODY and I convinced myself at the time that I didn't have
serious feelings for him, until that point...the first thing that came
to mind was "what will happen between john and I ?!" and then that's
when it hit me (I'm falling in love with the dick face)

So later that night I give john a ring ring and to add insult to injury
I had a few drinks in my system (pfft)..so I end up telling john
EVERYTHING! And he gives me the reaction I expected...mad chill like its
no sweat off his back, he gives me reasons as to why I should be with
david...because he wants to see me "happy" and shit *rolls my eyes* so
then he starts getting upset with me because I started to tell him that
I'm confused on what I should do then that was followed by rambling and
we end up arguing and then we got off the phone.

So while we were off the phone I started crying like a little bitch
lol...so he ends up calling me back.. My ego kicks in and I realize I'm
NOT about to fall in love with somebody who isn't trying to go there
with me. So I explained that to him and I also suggested that him and I
talk less, so I can start to get over him and move on.

So niggas still have been talking everyday since then but only like once
a day vs. All day...but our end is near because he acts as if I didn't
share such vital info with him like being on the brink of falling in
love and shit....and he did said some super super wack shit to me
tonight and I'm kind of sick of this game I'm playing with him

Sooooo R.I.P john in andys love life

While we are on that note....I ending things with pablo as well...he's
wack and not worth my time.

Ehhh....well, next? Lol
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®

Well for starters, MY P.C IS BACK UP AND RUNNING! Me and dee were so
happy we did one of those "I'm a P.C commercials" (lmao @ I love the
slimming effect of a purple stripped shirt. CLASSIC!) ill be uploading
that bad boy later.... because I'm @ wack ass work right now being
non-proactive with the "team"....because I don't give a shit about this
12am-9am...well lets not get into that.

ALSO, I've updated my life a tad bit and got a freaking blackberry-- but
its wack..... because I HATE tmoblie...they haven't yet activated my
browser...and its like...who owns a blackberry without the browser?! Ehh
apparently Andy.

(These are some lame updates...but ima keep going)

Madddd shit has been going on in my love life!! Ugh...

And I'm almost done reading ' YOGA and the quest for the TRUE SELF' if
you haven't yet noticed, I'm a yogi in the making. Dude, I swear to
you...pick up one of these books and its bound to change your life for
the better. Of course my family and a few of my in the box friends think
I'm crazy and out of my mind...and you probably do too. But lets get
real for a few seconds...has it ever come across your feeble little
brain that maybe there is more to life than-- the new sneakers, myspace,
bad bitches, money, fame, and sex?! Open your eyes, kiddo.

Just for the sake of rambling

-Conan O'brien is the best late night show.
-Mcdonalds sweet tea is the best $1 I've ever spent.
-Chicks before dicks
-I don't care what people say...drinking milk from a cow is already bad
but drinking it from a goat is just unforgivable.
-Q-tip's album might be one of the BEST this year.
-why is Carson Dailys show like 15min long?

Alright...be back with that celibacy in the city jump.
Applebaum--
Sent from my T-Mobile Sidekick®